The Journey of a Sweet Little Boy and His Special Heart

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Nurse Angels

Last night I was already in my PJ's (Logan's lasix diaper had leaked all over my lap so I had changed into jammies) I figured I might as well try to get some sleep before Brad went back to the RMH (Ronald McDonald House) so that when he left I could manage being up with Logan during the night.  Logan usually loves Brad, but he would have nothing to do with him.  When Brad tried to hold him he freaked out, and when I am in the room he cries until I hold him.  The nurses finally took me aside and told me I needed to go back with Brad and sleep (I must have looked like a train wreck).  I cried and told them I couldn't leave and they promised me they would take such good care of Logan.  His nurse Rachel was the cutest nurse ever and so compassionate, and then Julie was Logan's very first nurse here from his first surgery- she comes and checks on him daily.  Julie said she didn't have a patient to take care of during the night so she could hold Logan all night if he needed it.  So I went to the house and slept like a rock.
Today we are smiling a little.  Logan had a little bath and we put his Superman shirt on him.  He is looking less like a patient and more like a baby.  The shirt makes a big difference because it hides some of the wires and tubes.  I let the kids (Ashlyn and Tanner) see him on the computer this morning when we talked- up until now (post 2nd surgery) I have always made excuses of why they can't see Logan, (he is sleeping or a doctor is helping him) because he looked so miserable I didn't want it to worry the kids.  Today when Ashlyn saw him she said, "Logan why is your head so big."  Brad and I thought he was starting to look "normal" again- good thing she didn't see him a few days ago!
Thank you to this wonderful heart community for reaching out.  I know we have never met, and most likely we never will.  But it helps to know it gets better.  These are experiences I would never wish upon anyone- and I wish you hadn't had to go through this, but it helps to know someone understands what we are feeling and going through.  Most of all it helps to know that our Logan will be back!
Yesterday I was really questioning our decision to come out here, maybe not questioning it, but wishing we were home.  We have ended up with the surgery the doctors in Utah were going to do in the first place.  But then, I still know we were meant to come here.  The sweet nurse Julie that held Logan through the night pulled me aside yesterday and said, "I just wanted to let you know I think you are two of the best parents I have ever met.  I think it is incredible that you were willing to come all this way to try.  To give Logan hope."  She said Logan is so lucky to have us, and that she hopes we don't regret our decision because we gave it every fighting chance.  I needed to hear that yesterday.  Maybe our coming out here will bring Logan comfort when he is a teenager dealing with his heart and he can know that we did everything we could in our power to help him.  And we will never have to wonder, what if.
They are taking Logan off the sedation completely today.  We are hoping he does okay with that.  He ate 2 oz. yesterday, but that was it.  They are going to give us today to try to get him eating again, and if he still won't eat they will have to put in the NG tube (feeding tube).  Our nurse today is really on top of managing his pain, but not going overboard- that is good.  (He is actually sleeping in his bed right now).  So here is to a new day!


  1. Good nurses are one of the few bright spots of having a child in the hospital! I still love my favorites! One of them told us basically the same thing one day after a rough bought- she asked us to go to San Fran and eat some soup at Pier 39 for her. It was so sweet, it was her way of saying, it's ok, you need to take a break before you break, ya know? I LOVE nurses!

    I am putting a package in the mail tomorrow for you!

  2. I'm so glad you both got some sleep. CHOP CICU nurses are the absolute best. We had a similar experiences after both of Zoe's surgeries at CHOPH - told to go out for a date night and go back to RMH for a good night's sleep. The nurses held Zoe all night long and ever took her out to the nurses station at 2 a.m. when she just wanted company. It's wonderful having the knowledge that your baby is in great hands if you want to step out for a while and get some fresh air.

    Logan is on the mend. Great news. I hope to see that he doubles his intake today, or better.

    Continued thoughts and prayers from Arizona.


  3. Hang in there!! He will turn the corner. I promise. It's got to be lonely without friends stopping by, so I am glad you guys have wonderful nurses to watch over him. Remember, you have to take care of yourself and sleep during this ordeal. It would be horrible to wear yourself down and catch a cold and then not be allowed to comfort your baby. Take advantage of your nurses and let them keep him at night. You will sleep better and it will all look a little more manageable tomorrow!!

  4. I'm so glad things are looking better today! I hope the eating goes well and there will be no need for the feeding tube. Rachel, of course was the sweetest nurse - it's all in a name! :)
    I had the same feeling as the nurse about the outcome of the surgery and your decision. If you wouldn't have gone and just done the surgery here, you would've always wondered 'what if'. But now you KNOW that you did all that you could, and there is no doubt as to what he needed. Know you are guided and that your faith will not fail.
    Continued prayers, hope, love and belief!

  5. Randy and I have thought a lot about your family. We continue to keep yours in our prayers.

  6. I agree with Ali, this is not the time to get sick. I hope Logan gets his appetite back today.